We live in a fast paced world. Everywhere you look there are cell phones, instant messages, direct messages, private messages, texts, video conferencing, video calls, email, etc… To say we are globally connected almost goes without saying. The question of whether we can handle and stay up with the pace has yet to be determined.
As much as I am lover of these easy and seamless way to connect, I have also found myself with the challenge of limiting the amount of time I stay connected. It really comes down to choices.
An inquiry I love working with is, does this choice serve my happiness or sabotage it?
Each choice we make has its own ripple effect that will continue to intermingle with our lives - and the lives of others. Even the choice to not make a choice has its own profound butterfly effect.
One of the most common excuses I hear from clients, friends and family members around not doing something they really want to do revolves around time. Here’s a few popular ones that you might relate to.
I don't have enough time in the day.
I would do x, but I have no idea where I’d find the time.
Time is flying by - how can I possibly fit one more thing into my schedule?
I’m too old (or too young) to explore any new endeavors - I missed my time.
The thing is every single one of us on planet Earth has the same, exact amount of hours in the day to do with as we please. It’s how we choose to use them that is the key.
Most people I know spend countless minutes and possibly hours during the day doing mindless, repetitive work. It could be work in the traditional sense of working at a job. Or, it might be in the realm of chores and activities you do to fill your day.
What about time spent in an on-line format? Answering or sending emails. Replying or sending out text messages. Scrolling through social media sights.
Many of us feel so inter-connected to each other’s lives that we have simply forgotten what it’s like to reconnect with ourselves. This, in my humble opinion, is the foundation on which all other relationships are built upon.
If you don’t carve out time during the day just for you, then are you really surprised that you feel mounting sensations of being spaced out, hurried, frenzied or easily hooked into other peoples drama?
Few things are more frustrating then feeling you do not have any time for yourself. If we were to honestly look at where we are giving our time away, we would most likely be daunted and possibly exasperated.
Now for those of you in complete denial about the wasted time/excuses area, I would invite you to observe your thoughts and speech for a 24 hour period. Check in with every thought, word or phrase that is an excuse. Then, write it down.
I am absolutely serious. Write each and every excuse down. This will actually show you your repetitive thinking patterns in real time. You will notice after this eye-opening exercise how your habitual thinking is either serving you or sabotaging you.
When there are negative thoughts, take note. Are they really even true? Most likely these are false beliefs that have been taken on as truth. The good news is these are only thoughts and thoughts can be changed.
I have done this exercise myself and believe me - it’s very, very revealing.
The truth is I was living a life more committed to my actions than my thoughts of what I hoped and longed for. In many ways I didn’t realize I was more committed to staying safe, small and dimmed down rather than bold, daring and very, very shiny.
With the understanding that I was completely out of alignment with what I said I wanted and my actual reality, I decided to make a change.
So what did I do to help change?
I recognized that I needed to begin my day with me and only me.
A big part of the previous misalignment came down to feeling pulled in many directions and drained at the end of the day. Even though I would tell myself over and over, I’ll get x done later. I’ll meditate later. I’ll have a nice cup of tea later. I’ll find ten or twenty minutes to just relax later.
And big surprise, that “later” time that I was so determined would magically show up rarely did. Time for an overhaul!
In dedicating my day to myself first, I actually begin by preparing the night before. I decided to do a one week experiment to see if I could retrain myself to be in bed and asleep by 10 p.m..
Around 9 p.m. I start to wrap up whatever I’m doing - reading, watching a movie, laundry, dishes.
Absolutely no phone, tv or electronics in the bedroom. For me this is a non-negotiable.
I’m in bed and might do some light reading on or before 10 p.m. I’m asleep within minutes. What I’ve found is that by following this easy and gentle routine I’m naturally inclined to wake up earlier.
Now I wake up between 5 and 6 a.m. easily. No checking social media, no answering emails, no toxic or harsh news, etc…. just time for me to ease into the day.
I have time to slowly and lovingly start my day with me. Fix some ginger or green tea. Meditate to relaxing music for 20 minutes. Pet the cats. Read a passage from an uplifting book or shuffle one of my angel decks to see what my message is for the day.
Breakfast is a conscious act where I enjoy the flavor and texture of each food or beverage. I’m not rushed.
This extra hour that has been gifted into my day is one of the most self-loving acts I have done for myself in a long time.
I choose when to turn on electronics. I choose when to begin engaging with the outer world. These things do not run my life. I am part of their life, but it’s on my terms.
The truth is when we begin our day dedicated to our own personal well-being and heart-centered actions, it sets us up to handle the rest of the day from a more centered place. We move from being reactive to the outer world to pro-active with our mental and emotional hygiene.
By pro-active I mean we are interacting from a conscious space of “let me think about it” or “is this something I really want to engage in and spend my time and energy on?” And when we do decide to engage it’s not from a space of resentment, it’s from a space of true connection.
Checking in with ourselves first is all about self-love and self-respect. It’s not about what others want you to do, it’s about what you want for you. This is being in true integrity. And, that my friends is where the magic happens.
Observe your thoughts and words over a 24 hour period. Are they uplifting or excuse based? What simple, self-loving action can you take to bring more positive and affirming energy into your day?
With love and light,
💛
Joanna
”a trusted voice to your angels and guides”
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